There is an old tale that goes around NGO workers that if you fly to Latin America with work…if you are very lucky…you fly via Miami. If you are even luckier, your flight connections will mean you get the spend the night there. So I was lucky enough to find that was the case with my latest trip!
In a job where I feel we are made to consistenly feel guilty about taking time off and time for ´us´ when we are working , this was one of the few times when we could justify to oursleves a night out in Miami. An almost guilt free ´perk and ´us´time to relax. We weren´t choosing to do so oursleves, it just happened to work out that way.
The longer I do this job and the more time I spend with other Youth Workers and people in similar chairty jobs, the more I realise how all consuming it is, and the more I see how it is ingrained in us, in our training, to always self-reflect and constructivly criticise what we do. This is great and makes us better youth workers. Yet the more I see of this, the more I can how damaging it can be, when it becomes a habit to always reflect on what we can do better . This escalates into almost consistent self-criticism. “We are good youth workers so we sit around and beat oursleves up about how bad we are at our job”. By focussing on the 10% that we can do better, we naturally overlook the 90% we have done well. This means we don´t ever think we have done a “good job” or take the pride, confidence and motivation from that, which we need as human beings to keep going.
I meet some unbelievably inspiring and talented youth workers on my travels and i just wish they´d realise that more and give themslves the hug and pat on the back they deserve.
I´m the worst at it, I know, but I did try to say to myself about Miami to just “enjoy myself”, and ”I did deserve a night on South Beach”. And that I certainly did. The late evening swim on the South Beach was awesome and we walked along the sea wake as the sun set. The bars were amazing, the crab dinner unbelievable and the dancing and club (where we go ID´d!! So happy!!) brilliant fun. Our “One night in Miami” was one to remember.
We then had to get up and fly off to Honduras and Colombia for some hard work. Should I feel guilty for having some fun? Am I beating myself up about it? …hmmm…..
Hey matey – you deserved Miami. Good piece about Tegucigalpa too….
Thought of your thing about over-reflecting today at the Geo Williams ‘Reflective practice’ workshop in Leeds. It was all good stuff and Mary Wolfe facilitated it exteremely well. But…
There was a grey guy there (‘I sit behind a desk and I enjoy it’), with a grey beard and grey jumper (advisedly I have to say probably 50 [!!!!!!]) who said, and I quote, ‘I reflected on my reflection of my student’s reflection’.
I have to ask when do you end up disappearing up your own bot?
He also said (you can tell I warmed to him) ‘we need a framework to tease out some boundaries’… please just shoot me if i ever say any of the above….
enjoy Latin America, don’t iron on the bed
cheers…..
Hi Stu,
He sounds like the sort of guy i would have loved too! I’ll remember that ‘I reflected on my reflection of my student’s reflection’. So true!!
Bed is very safely unburnt at the mo…so no need to worry!!